I realized long ago that the only way out of the cycle of anxiety and depression I had been feeling most of my life was to turn my focus and attention inward. Somehow I knew the solution was to learn to love myself and to tame somehow the hugely critical voice that always seemed to be shouting at me.
I was so tired at this point in my life, trying my hardest to live a good life. It was a struggle, though. I had people trying to help me, but their efforts, while loving, fell away without success. Dealing with endless disappointments, discouraging events, and harmful habits made me tired, really tired. My energy was breaking down. I wanted peace but had no relationship to what peace felt like. It was a concept that had no relevance in my life, so making it happen felt out of reach, just another discouraging effort.
I had heard people talk of self-love, but somehow it always felt secondary. It was a good thought for others but didn’t feel relevant to my life. Finally, I had the realization that looking inward and learning to care for myself deeply was the only direction that I hadn’t looked. I had tried so many other approaches that had me look at the outer circumstances of my life, rather than casting my gaze inward.
When I looked inward, everything started to change. I began making time for my feelings, and while very hard at times, it broke my world open to incredible amounts of personal compassion that helped me move towards self-love.
It was about this time that I also started to practice Kundalini yoga and meditate daily. My starting practice was very short at first, about three to five minutes a day, but I did it every day. I journaled my feelings afterward and spent time with whatever personal emotions appeared. I had a commitment to myself that moved me in a direction I had never before explored. This time with myself started became my life line.
Self-love is the time we spend looking into our hearts and hearing the whispers of the deepest parts of our being. The love of self-means we pay attention to what makes us happiest. When we gain knowledge of how we meet and interact with the world, we can make mindful decisions that nurture our growth and healing.
Direct your gaze inward, with a dedication for self-love, and watch your world transform.